week one- theatrino!

Well, the saying for this week seemed to be “come on Jah, give us a break” ! ahahah We have had an extremely FULL week. 3 show/3 workshop days, losing the car keys, being locked in the apartment, someone taking our car keys making us drive 25km at 10pm to get them and all of us getting sick on Thursday! Let’s just say it was an extremely eventful week where there wasn’t ever a dull moment.

The shows all went pretty well. We really did hit the ground running, blocking and running things for the first time while on stage during performance! Ahahah It was intense! Learning lines the night before and ho[ping for the best the next day. It has been madness! We get up at 6:30am and go to bed late because when we get home we have to learn lines, blocking, eat and shower! In a way I am glad there wasn’t internet in the Milan flat because it would be a distraction, and we never really had time to go online.

The kids are great though and it’s been really fun performing again and being on stage. When the kids join in singing or cheer or even get excited, it’s such a thrill and just makes me so happy inside! I am loving every minute of it even though I am actually exhausted- physically and mentally. It’s so much to learn and my body seems to be in shock but it’s all really fun and been one heck of an adventure thus far!

I haven’t seen too much of Italy to really report back, it’s mostly been Milan and the surrounding areas so it’s been pretty boring and industrial to be honest. Right now I’m living in the Milan flat with 7 other people and it’s a small space with only one bathroom! Oh the joys! Ahahaha So it’s been fun coordinating showers and washing and teeth brushing times! Ahahaha

Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves but also a bit frustrated as well because of the lack of rehearsal and line learning time. I’m sure once we’re all off book we can relax a bit more and begin to enjoy our time here in bella Italia!

airport - going back for another adventure

me at the Charlotte North Carolina Airport. Listening to tunes, sipping my last Starbucks and bout to surf the web :)

I am sitting at Metro in Detroit waiting for my flight, 3.5 hours early because of the terrorist act last week. Security is supposedly heightened, however, when I dragged my teary eyes through security it seemed the same as it always is… so I’m not sure how I feel about that. Regardless, the supposed “hardest part” is behind me. I said goodbye to everyone I love dearly and it felt as though I was ripping my heart from my chest. I am sitting here with my heart in my stomach. I feel incredibly sick and am wondering why I signed myself up for this 9 month voyage on my own.

I have 3 flights ahead of me and a train ride before I get to San Remo. I left my house at 10:15am Monday morning and will not arrive in San Remo until 7:15pm Tuesday :s . It’s going to be a LONG two days.

As I looked into everyone’s cloudy eyes as they said goodbye, I can’t help but feel guilty. If I had stayed in Windsor, gone back to school and found a job there, I would be stable and wouldn’t have to say goodbye to anyone, or make them feel sad because of me. I cant help the way I feel- but I almost feel selfish because I am hurting the people I love to fulfill my dream. I knew this time it would be much harder to say goodbye, but I never anticipated it to be as difficult as it was. Friends, family, my mom and Alyssa….each one hurt a little bit more and I cant help but wonder, is it worth it!?

“with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave”

I am now completely alone and independent for the duration of 9 months and 2 days. It is incredible, exhilarating, scary, complicated and liberating among many other things. I look forward to the adventure once I have settled in and am more confident in my decision to leave. I just need to get past the point I am at right now where I feel incredibly lonely and sad. Its just going to be one hell of an emotional ride.

Thank you to everyone for your love and support. I am eternally grateful to have you in my life. I know the next few months won’t be easy on any of us, but it is all a learning experience that will make us stronger in the end, and when we say “hello” again in person, it will make all the pain disappear….